A few weeks ago I had this blog post (https://youthspecialties.com/blog/when-your-spouse-isnt-involved-in-your-ministry/) published on the Youth Specialties blog which was a big deal to me. I was very excited. Having a dream to write and having spent my first year out of college working for a church I felt I was more than able to share these insights with the Youth Ministry Online Community.
I am now currently preparing to leave my first job out of college to begin a new one. This new job will be working with families in the community still, but will not be in a traditional church. In fact my job will not be for an exclusively Christian organization. I will, however, be doing Community Development through education. Community development is something I went back and forth on throughout my years at college and I have always striven to do service with a community development mindset as a Youth and Children's Pastor.
This past week after submitting my letter of resignation at the church I have been reflecting on ones vocation, occupation, and how we live our lives. I have realized that even though I am starting a different job doing something that I love and feel led to do that doesn't mean I am done with "traditional ministry." This year along with starting a new job and potentially pursuing a masters my wife and I have accepted the volunteer role of coordinating our community garden. I also intend to still pursue ways to do ministry with children and youth within the community in the most appropriate way. I still want to accept preaching opportunities and I will of course find ways I can recruit for and promote YouthWorks. We are currently both involved in a House Church and as we navigate this new stage of life that is our church for now. Having these outlets and knowing they are available to me has been very beneficial for this time of preparing for transitions, however, it is still hard.
It is hard to see people both happy for you and sad to see you go. It is bittersweet to hear people's thoughts on how things will be once you are gone. This past evening as I was walking in one of our local parks with my wife I realized how on edge this process is making me. I want to snap at my dog often and I want to just sit and cuddle with my cat. I want to drink lots of coffee and ramble excitedly to my wife. I am stressed, on edge, and frankly upset about leaving and yet I know that is the next step. I know I have made the right decision and yet it is still hard. It's also difficult to put into words why I am struggling with it.
Moral of the story: No matter the reason transitions are hard. Change can be a good thing and is not something one should be afraid of, but it's still hard.
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven- Ecclesiastes 3:1
